Teaching Gratitude and Graciousness

As parents the greatest gift we can give our children is the ability to navigate successfully through life. One of the best ways to do this is to teach them to be grateful. Practicing gratitude daily has many benefits but at this time of year we focus more on giving and receiving presents.

Jimmy Kimmel asked parents to play a trick on their children. The parents were to give their children an early Christmas gift. The twist was that the gift had to be something the children would never want. Then the parents video-taped their offspring opening said presents and posted them on YouTube.

Some parents wrapped up half-eaten sandwiches and rotten bananas. I enjoyed watching the little girl open the carton of six eggs and then proceed to crack open an egg. The child who got the rotten banana actually started eating it, peel and all.

Most of it made me laugh out loud but there were two clips that disturbed me. One was the boy in the red striped sweater. He has some anger management issues, I think. The fact that he was allowed to attack his parents bothered me as well. That was bad enough, but the last clip was over the top. The comment made by the young boy about what Santa could do was quite rude. Those parents get no “Parent of the Year Award” in my book. Apparently that language is considered acceptable in that household. I found it vulgar and disgusting especially to be uttered by what appears to be a ten-year old.

See for yourself. CLICK HERE to watch. Oh, and if you read the comments below the video, some of them are quite vulgar as well. (Just my humble opinion)

In addition to being grateful, perhaps we should also teach graciousness. When preparing my children to attend family gatherings, we discussed opening “Aunt Claire” gifts. My husband’s godmother, Aunt Claire, often gave gifts that weren’t quite what he wanted, like the year he received the cowboy hat. Still, he said thank you and even wore it for a short time. Then it was relegated to the back of the closet for all eternity.

Gifts are not so much about the recipient as the giver. There is a great article from USAToday about this very subject. CLICK HERE to read it.

The bottom line is that when you open a gift, even if it’s not something you like, it’s important to smile and thank the giver. It’s more about their thoughtfulness, time, and efforts.  Teaching this to children is key to avoiding social gaffes and possible embarrassment.  A polite, well behaved, gracious child is a gift not only to you and anyone your child encounters, but to your child as well.

Has your child ever reacted in a not-so-appropriate manner when they opened a gift?  Leave me a comment.  I'd love to hear about it.

Politeness Pays

Politeness really pays. When children are sitting politely waiting for their balloon, I pick them first. The other day as I was feverishly making balloon animals for a dozen children, only one of them said thank you. The others just grabbed their balloon. Often when I’m clowning I have parents who prompt their child to use their polite words. To them I say, “Thank you!”

A well-mannered child doesn’t happen by accident. Teaching your child manners starts with you modeling good manners and then having her say please and thank you when she is able to say a few words. Most importantly, manners need to be practiced in order for them to be part of your child’s daily habits. Manners are an important part of civility and by using manners on a daily basis your home will be more peaceful. An added bonus is that when you are out in public your child is apt to be better behaved, earning you kudos as a good parent!

There are some great resources on the web for teaching manners to your child:
· The Etiquette Princess has a great book for young children.
· Sylvan Education has a page with lots of links for teaching manners.
· The ever popular Emily Post has a great site with lots of articles about manners.

Unfortunately what I see happening lately is that parents are not teaching their children manners and it is one more thing that the schools have to teach. This leaves less time for teaching the nitty-gritty academic subjects. As a result I am seeing an overall decline in intelligence and higher level thinking abilities. Is this what we want for our next generation?

Is your child polite?  Leave me a comment.  I’d love to hear from you!

Politeness Pays

One of the best things that parents* can teach their children is manners. I always give “extra points” to the parents of children who say please and thank you when I’m making animal balloon sculptures. 

Politeness pays! People are more apt to want to interact/help your child is he is polite. The basics of please, thank you, and excuse me come in so handy every day! As a clown I will give the patient, polite child a balloon much faster than the demanding rude child.

This applies to the classroom as well. School is preparation for the “real world” for when children get older and go on to further education and/or jobs. Being able to wait your turn and use courteous words gets you farther in life. 

Civility breeds civility. By this I mean if your child is well-mannered, people will treat him better. Conversely, if your child is ill-mannered, people will avoid interacting with him. Which would you prefer?

And as always, your actions speak much louder than your words. Do you set an example? Are you polite and well-mannered? And not just to others but your child as well. That way they’ll be polite and well-mannered to you. It’s a two-way street!

How did you teach your child manners? Leave me a comment. I’d love to hear from you!

*By parents I mean any primary caregiver of children.